Pete's Got Competition

Ask anyone and they'll say Pete's going to win this charade. Go on! Ask someone! Now! See! If they said anyone else they're liars and you shouldn't trust anything they say to you ever again in the future. But Pete's house-cred has dropped as he's now infatuated by blond bumhole Nikki. The middlesex slag has not aged mentally or vocally since she was four although she has grown physically (and had a barely noticeable tit job).

But while the whistling monkey has grown complacent, wondering how many bananas he can buy with the prize money, Aisleyne is racing against him and he doesn't even know it. The daft bollocks. Aisleyne is gaining ground in the house and out of it, because she seems incapable of bitching about anyone. She just aborbs other inmates' attempts to drag her into verbal cess-pits and somehow maintains an air of moral superiority - but not even in a smug way. What a bitch! Some observers have started to speculate that Aisleyne might not be human. This theory could hold value as her face does look like an alien's idea of what an attractive woman should look like. Unfortunately tentacles and a lack of thumbs tend to fuck up mask making. Trust me. I know.

Even Imogen's undisguised attempts to make Aisleyne bitch failed. Imogen is desperate for allies now Grace has gone. Lisa is a tad crude for her and she probably finds Mike boring (the irony). So statements like "Richard's brainwashing you" from the welsh bore had no effect. Other attempts to draw Aisleyne fell on deaf ears although as the moose is potentially an alien she might not have any to begin with. Even when the two were ordered back in from the garden Aisleyne gave Imogen a hug. What an incredibly nice bitch that Aisleyne is.