Lea Gets It Off Her Chest (Ha-ha!)

Absent mother Lea, whose MM breasts are reinforced with steel bands, revealed her true feelings to Big Chudder house adonis Pete tonight. As with all ill advised confessions this one came after the porn star had drunk a trough of booze.

"You're different, you're not touchy-feely and open with me anymore," Lea moaned. "You find everyone attractive bar me."
"I do but..." Pete replied looking scared.
"One kiss would be nice," Lea pushed on as she carried on necking her wine.
"Now I'm getting shy," Pete squirmed fleeing to the bedroom. But Lea was in hot pursuit.
"I can't help the way I feel," she said as she pinned the whistler to the wall with her twin turbines.
"Okay," Pete struggled. "So what's that then?"
"I like you," Lea mouthed rubbing her nipples against Pete.
"Really?" Pete whistled before trying to give her a hug. "I didn't realise."
"I'm not a dirty old woman," claimed Lea. "I shouldn't have said that."

Pete decided it was safer not to move or say anything so he stood completely still. Eventually Lisa and Richard appeared to see what was happening. Pete ran for his life. Lea tried to give chase, but her bra straps broke and she tripped over her own ridiculous breasts. She lay the floor in silence for a few moments before curling into a sobbing ball.