Moss Gets New Brand

Kate Moss is reportedly getting knobbed senseless by Big Chudder Big Mouth's presenter Russell Brand. Moss' sick fuck ex Pete The Shit Doherty won't be too pleased. Brand is close mates with Carl Barat who kicked Doherty out of the Libertines.

But Brand and Doherty have got more in common than just sharing the same gash. Brand used to be a crack, smack whore. He's apparently kicked his addictions to drug and sex, but made up sources reckon if anyone can drag him back into the gutter it's Moss.

Brand is no stranger to controversy in his working life as well. He got sacked from his first job with MTV for being drugged up. He introduced Kylie Minogue to his dealer and came into work dressed as Osama Bin Laden the day after 9/11. Hilarious cunt!

Now back at MTV Brand is enjoying more success as the eloquent, quick witted presenter of Big Mouth along with being a rated stand-up comedian. Whichever lucky bastard gets a picture of him and Kate snorting coke is going to be minted.