Mikey: Not Real

mooky.net can exclusively reveal that Mikey 'isn't real'. Mikey, who's "penis controls" his "brain" is actually a toy manufactured by the same people who brought us Noel Mighty Boosh Fielding and Vernon Loves Banging Tess Kay.


Mikey's true identity will be revealed to the housemates in a series of comedy BB 'interludes'. The first will involve the three 'Mikeys' pouncing on Pete when he's in the shower and then screaming double-jointedly into his face until he cries. As soon as he tries to escape, Vernon and Noel will disappear through trap doors in the floor, leaving Mikey no.1 to calm him back to gentle swears and whistles.

He will be compelled to deny these 'attacks' or risk 50 pence of the weekly food budget and his entire consignment of mirrors for the duration of the show.