Food Thief Outed

Shahbaz, self styled sultan of swing, coffed to hiding the housemates' food earlier this morning. Richard, who has assumed the mantle of leader in the house, glimpsed the food up Shahbaz' back passage when the nutter bent over in front of him. Shahbaz was forced to admit to his food snatching. In response the housemates unleashed their full fury on him.

Sezer demanded to know "Why would you do that, are you stupid?" The question came between mouthfuls of Richard's large, pale penis being thrust into the cock broker's mouth. "You shouldn't bite the hand that feeds you," retorted Shahbaz. As well as being a crap comeback, it didn't seem to make sense. Nevertheless as he began unloading the food from his chud passage he prompted lots of swearing, particularly from facially disfigured Lisa. He then sat in silence as the other Housemates took it in turns to bollock him. Richard called the act "the most immature thing" he'd ever seen.

Easy slut Nikki said "you've made me hate you" while Shahbaz's last friend Lea told him he'd "lost a friend". Shahbaz is now being watched closely to see if the collective hatred will drive him into a desperate act of suicide or if he will find relief that he doesn't have to listen to their inane chatter all day. The housemates have requested that the food Shahbaz shoved up his ass be replaced with stuff that isn't "dripping with shit."